As I was gearing up for my morning session of Prenatal Yoga Booty Ballet, I was filled with dreams of a relaxing workout, one where I am one with my body, and channeling my inner goddess.
Sounds great, right?
What could possibly go wrong?
Oh, that’s right – my preschooler was home, and Yoga Booty Ballet was clearly not on his agenda for that day.
From the second I got into my first position; I could tell this was a bad choice. Garrison insisted on turning downward facing dog into an unexpected toddler rodeo. And soon, when he wasn’t on my back, he was finally doing his own toddler yoga; we’ll call his position “upward facing toddler booty” right in my face.
Find your inner peace, Laura!
Maybe some light stretching next? Nope. Now its time to push mommy off the mat.
Who taught my kid Sumo Wresting?!
What happened next is a bit of a blur.
I remember it was time to use some free weights, and I was in position for arm curls.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a wind up and seconds later….
I got popped right in the nose with a sharp object. Stunned, my eyes immediately started watering. And to make it worse, I reached up to feel the source of my pain, and I was bleeding.
And the weapon that caused such mass destruction?
As I looked around, I saw it lying innocently on the floor – it was…a plastic Owlette bath squirter. Are you freaking kidding me? My son threw a 5-ounce piece of plastic at my face and now I’m bleeding?!
The next few minutes were filled with timeout and crying – from both me and my son. Yes, that reaction might have been extreme; but, hello, pregnancy hormones. After I got all cleaned up, and we had both calmed down, I decided my yoga sesh was done for the day.
Word to the wise: hold off on your “relaxing” prenatal yoga workouts until your child is out of the house.
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